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The Story About the Toddler

On January 18, 2002, Cordelia Krizsan Vogel was born. She spent a year getting sort of bigger and developing sort of a brain. You can read about that long, painful process here.

But now she can move, and learn, and think. And these new capabilities, combined with the complete lack of any moral sense or any instinct for self-preservation, have led to a variety of new adventures. Chronicled below.

Volume 1 Perversely Stupid.
Volume 2 Stumbling Aimlessly Into the Future
Volume 3 “OK, Cordelia. Now Say Fuck Like This. Draw Out the ‘U’ Sound. Fuuuuuuuck. Try That. Fuuuuuuck.”
Volume 4 How Much Would You Pay To Avoid the Horror?
Volume 5 The Amazing Boneless Baby
Volume 6 Throw the Kids In the Firing Line and See What Happens
Volume 7 Our Little Darling’s First Kill
Volume 8 Learning To Crush the Weak
Volume 9 Enthusiasm Is Contagious
Volume 10 Experiencing Halloween. Us, Not Her.
Volume 11 The Worst Parenting Advice, Ever
Volume 12 I Blame the Baby
Pictures Eight month old pictures of Cordelia. I’m lazy. More cuteness and snarky comments. New toddler journal coming shortly.
Volume 13 Why I'm a Mediocre Parent
Volume 14 Baby's First Punishment
Volume 15 I Never Wanted To Spend This Much Time Watching Someone Pee
Volume 16 Toddlers Are the Enemy
Volume 17 More About the Abuse Of Me By Her
Volume 18 The Bathtub
Volume 19 Drama!
Volume 20 Futile Attempts To Reclaim Our Lost Youth
Volume 21 More Parental Pissing and Moaning
Volume 22 The Particular Bug I Have Up My Ass This Month
Volume 23 “No! Don’t Hug Me! ... Arrgh! My Nice Shirt!”
Volume 24 Cordelia’s Birthday In the Necropolis
Volume 25 “Ok, Honey. Time To Be Another Brick In the Wall. Put On Your Shoes.”
Volume 26 “Science Is Stupid”
Volume 27 “Father, I Shall be Avenged”
Volume 28 Every Parent Gets One Paranoia
Volume 29 Filling Her Empty Little Brain With Whatever I Choose
Volume 30

The Definition of Insanity

Volume 31

A Cute Little Bundle Of Festering Disease

Volume 32

The Purpose of Parents

Epilogue

And So It Came To Pass. Again.


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